Congress Is A Woman’s Place… The Messy Middle

Hope you had a lovely Presidents’ Day and did all of the traditional activities of the day (holding cabinet meetings, making patriotic speeches, pardoning turkeys, etc.)

It had been my intention to get this post out yesterday, but it’s sort of perfect that I didn’t because this week’s post is brought to you by the “messy middle”. It’s that part of project when tasks don’t quite come together the way you think they will. Where a shiny new idea has lost some of it’s gleam, but the finish line is still a ways off.

Many ideas can die a slow death in the “messy middle”. You start to encounter obstacles and, as a result, wonder if each obstacle is a sign you should pack up your things and ditch this doomed project.

While I’m not quite in that place, I am definitely experiencing some messiness in finishing up the process of sending out these 50 shirts to 50 Congresswomen.

When last I left you, I had 39 Yeses to send a shirt and 11 where I was waiting to hear back from the Congresswomen. It would seem to be just a matter of making a few follow-up calls and then call it a day. (this is where the music changes to a more ominous tone and “little did she know…” scrolls across the screen)

In following up with those 11 offices last week, I received 2 more No’s and the other 9 were all variations of “slow your roll, we gotta see about this”.

While each “No” that I received wasn’t directed toward my idea behind sending the shirts, but rather, adhering to additional rules put in place regarding not receiving gifts, I gotta be honest, it kinda bummed me out.

Plus, on that particular day, I hit a number of other bumps with work and life in general. I started to think if I looked up I would see one of those cartoon rainclouds dripping above my head.

It is at that moment I recalled the completely annoying truth I have heard before from people much wiser than I: “Pain is a much more effective teacher than comfort.” Ugh.

This basically tells me that in the disappointment and discomfort, I have the “opportunity” to learn a thing or two. Insert eye-roll as you give air quotes and say the word “opportunity” with just a touch of sarcasm. (I can be a begrudging student of life at times)

While I am clear that I will send 50 shirts to 50 congresswomen, it is probably not going to work out exactly the way I initially pictured it.

It may not help that I pictured all 50 shirts shipping at the same time with the hallelujah chorus playing as I entered the post office. The sheer volume of packages would result in everyone else insisting I go immediately to the front of the line and, when they hear the story of what we are doing, the postal employee saying it would be the honor of the United States Postal Service to convey these packages free of charge. (too much?)

All kidding aside, when circumstances are challenging or things take a turn different from our expectations, it can be difficult to muster the energy to carry on.

A couple of things that help when I’m in the “messy middle”:

1. Take Small Steps. If things are not going well, I find it helps to break down obstacles into smaller tasks. Rather than looking at the entire problem at once, can it be broken down into smaller actions? Sometimes small progress can “grease the wheels” to get things moving again. But if not, even 1% improvement is moving you in the right direction.
2. Give It 24 Hours. Even in the crummiest of moments, it is rare that things will feel exactly the same after a day. That’s not to say that circumstances change, although sometimes they do, but more likely your outlook may look a little different; the kind of difference that can bring a shifted perspective. While I was waiting it out, I I was inspired to create a little artwork (see right).
3. Talk to Someone. I’m a verbal processor, so it’s no surprise I would find value in talking through things with a friend. However, even if you aren’t someone who would normally want to talk, there is value in sharing what’s happening and potentially getting another perspective. We aren’t designed to go at life alone (even the Lone Ranger had Tonto).
4. Make a List. I’m not saying that lists have magic powers (although they absolutely do) but if you are feeling down and just can’t find solid ground, it can’t hurt to remind yourself of what IS working. It’s amazing how quickly we forget the victories and zero-in on the problems. With this latest round in the “messy middle”, I actually took out a stack of post-its and started writing down what is going well and sticking them up on the walls in the office. (The only thing missing from my happy-thoughts-conspiracy-wall is the red yarn tying them all together).

So while I am in my “messy middle”, I’m committing to keep moving forward. Certainly, adjustments are going to be made along the way, but I hope that sharing the good, the bad and even the ugly that I’m encountering in trying to figure this out will bring value to whatever goals or projects you may be working on.

Drop me a line and let me know what you think or maybe share your “messy middle” remedies. Stay tuned for more progress on sending 50 shirts, which will soon include names and social media handles of the Congresswomen we are sending shirts to in the hopes of making some t-shirt sightings. Cheers!